What's the stupidest question you've heard recently?


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ilmaestro
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I had an early contender the other week when, the day after people had to be airlifted from the roof of their buildings in the city due to floods, someone came in to my shop and asked me if the greyhound meeting was on in Sheffield. But this (a short extract from a conversation between my Mom and the girl at the bank when I took my Mom to open a new account today) took the biscuit:

"And what is [your financial dependent's] date of birth?"

"The 31st of the 5th, 87"

"1987?"

"..."
#1 at 01:19:33 - 14/07/2007
Carlo
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O_o

My contribution. Asked at 2:30pm today as I was leaving the office to go to do an installation for a customer near Oxford street.

"Will you be coming back to the office afterwards?"
#2 at 01:22:18 - 14/07/2007
Micro_Explosion
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/writes 50 page essay called "my regular day at work"
#3 at 01:26:05 - 14/07/2007
ilmaestro
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Carlo said:O_o

My contribution. Asked at 2:30pm today as I was leaving the office to go to do an installation for a customer near Oxford street.

"Will you be coming back to the office afterwards?"

That's some gentle comedy, my man.
#4 at 01:27:51 - 14/07/2007
repairmanjack
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Rang Virgin to report a fault with our broadband. Woman on the end of the phone asked for our postcode to identify us. I told her. She then said: "Can you spell that?"

Eh?
#5 at 01:41:17 - 14/07/2007
Micro_Explosion
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repairmanjack said: She then said: "Can you spell that?"

Eh?


What was the rest of the postcode? That's only the first letter.
#6 at 01:47:18 - 14/07/2007
ilmaestro
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A guy came in today and asked how he would put a bet on Tiger Woods to win the Open. So I showed him. His next question was: "and how do I put a bet on someone who isn't Tiger Woods?"
#7 at 01:40:37 - 17/07/2007
peej
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Stupidest question I've been asked recently.

"Are you on the take from a company in the games industry?"


Oh I laughed long and hard at that one.

Long and hard.

Peej

#8 at 11:06:11 - 17/07/2007
Lutzie
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Oooo!!! Spill the bean Peej, who asked you that one?
#9 at 11:14:17 - 17/07/2007
peej
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A company I've been mailing to death to try and get an interview from. Not sure why the question even came up. They've seen my (ahem) track record on here and EG, and asked it based on that.

The games industry works in a very bizarre way.

Peej
#10 at 11:52:42 - 17/07/2007
Roobs
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Spanky and I are due to go to my cousin's wedding in September. As I am bridesmaid, it's important that we go and everything's booked, etc. However, Spanky's work 'do' also falls on the same day so Spanky's going to have to miss the work thing. Yesterday he got an email from his boss (via the secretary) saying "Can't you get out of the wedding?"

NO HE CAN'T YOU FUCKING PLUM.
#11 at 11:56:01 - 17/07/2007
boabg
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I asked Sky to move my direct debit date to the last day of the month and the woman on the other end asked if the 28th was ok.

Well it would be if every month was February you fucking idiot.
#12 at 12:12:58 - 17/07/2007
Alastair
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boabg said:I asked Sky to move my direct debit date to the last day of the month and the woman on the other end asked if the 28th was ok.

Well it would be if every month was February you fucking idiot.


I suspect that their systems only allow them to set a single day of the month. Hence the 28th.
#13 at 12:18:26 - 17/07/2007
boabg
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Alastair said:
boabg said:I asked Sky to move my direct debit date to the last day of the month and the woman on the other end asked if the 28th was ok.

Well it would be if every month was February you fucking idiot.


I suspect that their systems only allow them to set a single day of the month. Hence the 28th.


Nah I eventually got it through to her that the 28th wasn't acceptable. I've now got a letter from them saying 1st of every month so fingers crossed.
#14 at 13:47:37 - 17/07/2007
smoothpete
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One from work a few weeks ago

"What station was Paddington Bear found at?"

Um, I dunno, let me think about that one

And this from my missus 2 nights ago, I was channel hopping and dog borstal or some shit was on. The narrator said "and now we revisit Biscuit and Foofi to see how Andrew and Catherine have been getting on with our advice", my other half then says, "What, those people are Biscuit and Foofi?!?!" - No love, I think you may have got that mixed up... :P
#15 at 16:05:01 - 17/07/2007
Legion
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Cool names, though.

/earmarks "Foofie" for potential daughter's name
#16 at 17:15:42 - 17/07/2007
JimJam
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It wasn't recent but I was asked how much I reckoned Steve McQueen got for appearing in that Ford Puma ad a few years ago.

Myself and a mate were once asked by a Seattle cab driver what language we spoke in England. The worst part of it was that when we said "Errr, English", he laughed and said "We teach you guys everything, don't we !".
#17 at 17:21:21 - 17/07/2007
peej
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JimJam said:It wasn't recent but I was asked how much I reckoned Steve McQueen got for appearing in that Ford Puma ad a few years ago.

Myself and a mate were once asked by a Seattle cab driver what language we spoke in England. The worst part of it was that when we said "Errr, English", he laughed and said "We teach you guys everything, don't we !".


That actually doesn't surprise me at all :)

Peej
#18 at 17:41:58 - 17/07/2007
Alastair
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smoothpete said:And this from my missus 2 nights ago, I was channel hopping and dog borstal or some shit was on. The narrator said "and now we revisit Biscuit and Foofi to see how Andrew and Catherine have been getting on with our advice", my other half then says, "What, those people are Biscuit and Foofi?!?!" - No love, I think you may have got that mixed up... :P

Heh! I can imagine my missus asking something similar....
Gotta love 'em. :o)
#19 at 18:17:03 - 17/07/2007
MetalDog
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Myself and a mate were once asked by a Seattle cab driver what language we spoke in England. The worst part of it was that when we said "Errr, English", he laughed and said "We teach you guys everything, don't we !".


0_o

I hear stories like this from my American friend in Syracuse. He told me once that one of his staff was amazed when she found out that we live in buildings. He said she seemed to be under the impression we lived in mud huts or something.
#20 at 18:29:34 - 17/07/2007
smoothpete
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This is from an old EG thread about cute stuff, still makes me smile to think about it :)

I showed my girlfriend babyanimalz.com last night, she likes cute stuff. She was browsing through the pictures while I was cooking in the other room, every now and again I'd hear "aaawwww" or "aahh, bless". Then she says "Pete! Pete! What's this animal? He's soooo cute, he looks like a furry human, is he a baby monkey?"

To which I said

"No sweetheart, that's an Ewok"

:D
#21 at 18:33:33 - 17/07/2007
HairyArse
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I've told this story many times before but I went to America and got asked if they had Yorkshire Terriers where I was from.

For those that don't know me, I live about 9 miles from Bradford. So in answer to her question.

YES WE FUCKING DO HAVE THEM. IN YORKSHIRE.
#22 at 18:34:10 - 17/07/2007
markh
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HairyArse said:I've told this story many times before but I went to America and got asked if they had Yorkshire Terriers where I was from.

For those that don't know me, I live about 9 miles from Bradford. So in answer to her question.

YES WE FUCKING DO HAVE THEM. IN YORKSHIRE.


I live about 9 miles from Bradford! o/
#23 at 18:40:11 - 17/07/2007
HairyArse
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Which way? I live in Haworth.
#24 at 18:41:00 - 17/07/2007
markh
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I'm in Horsforth on the outskirts of Leeds.

Not too far away though!

/stalks
#25 at 18:44:02 - 17/07/2007
HairyArse
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Cool, I'm vaguely aware of Horsforth. Have probably driven through it once or twice. Hope he doesn't mind me saying this but Rhythm lives in Morley too.

/changes domain to allabouttheyorkshiremassive
#26 at 18:46:45 - 17/07/2007
Tiger_Walts
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I have a brother who lives in Batley.
#27 at 18:52:55 - 17/07/2007
Ectox
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I know a grafitti 'crew' from Yorkshire...

/is 'in'
#28 at 21:46:00 - 17/07/2007
ilmaestro
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JimJam said:
Myself and a mate were once asked by a Seattle cab driver what language we spoke in England. The worst part of it was that when we said "Errr, English", he laughed and said "We teach you guys everything, don't we !".

More American stupidity (although it's got a huge chance of being a bit of an old wive's tale):

We were told during a visit to Aston Hall (a big, very very old stately home) from school that an American tourist had been round there at some time in the past and remarked "this place is great, but why did they build it so close to the freeway?".
#29 at 01:08:18 - 18/07/2007
Micro_Explosion
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:o)

I'm going to have expand my essay (mentioned above) from 50 pages to 100. Truly jaw dropping statements from bosses about what their people are doing.

I did get a good work one from someone who said "you accepted the meeting, you should be there". I WAS ON HOLIDAY YOU DOZY COW.

"Well that doesn't show much commitment does it?"

/nuts woman
#30 at 01:17:10 - 18/07/2007

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