An open post to cunting cyclists


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Legion
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You goddamn prats seem to be totally unaware that it's winter. If you insist on invading the motorcar's domain, without paying road tax I might add, then the least thing you can fucking do is obay the same bloddy laws. Namely, lights. I can't think of one car that comes equiped with night vision as standard, so if you don't want to be mown down, put some lights on your bike and don't dress in goth-black attire.

Also, junctions. If you want to use the road, then try and realise that a red light doesn't actually mean "Carry on through if the coast appears to be clear" it means stop like the rest of us road uses, you arrogant hippy twat. Also, at T-junctions, when you're supposed to give way, then how about, you know, giving way instead of just flying out and causing cars to swearve out of your way.

It'd also be nice if you had insurance, just for when (not if) you mow down a elderly lady because you decided not to stop at a crossing, or when (not if) you crash into a car.

This mainly targetted at one particular prick last night, who flew out of a junction on his bike (complete with no lights and black clothing), in front of my car, and caused me nearly to have a head on collision with another vehicle. Unfortunately my gut reaction was to try and avoid them. However I have spent last night and two hours so far today conditioning myself not to react in any way should a similar incident arrise in the future.

If this happens again I'm now fully prepared to carry on as normal and if I hit you, I hit you. However, I assure you this does cause an accident I will stop, if only to ascertain if you have the means on your person to pay for the repairs to my car. If you don't then I'm more than willing to put my car into reverse and drive straight over you (slowly of cause, just to prove that it's not just speed that kills) before spitting on your still twitching corpse and riding off to murder your entire family.

Thankyou for reading.

Mike.

#1 at 12:33:29 - 05/12/2007
Binky
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Morning Mike.
#2 at 12:39:27 - 05/12/2007
Legion
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Morning

/waves

#3 at 12:51:24 - 05/12/2007
HairyArse
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/tries to wave
/can't because of broken arm because some cunt motorist reversed over me seven times

:P
#4 at 12:58:47 - 05/12/2007
Rhythm
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This thread needs renaming - it isn't a cyclist rant, it's a "shithead road users" rant. Yes, jumping red lights is cuntish and dangerous, but guess what? Not every cyclist does it. Stop labelling.

The prospect of getting someone to pay for the damage to your car is a bit silly too - there's no requirement for peds to have lights on so if you hit one as they stepped into the road from, say, behind a truck would you want them to pay up?

If the damage is to the side or rear of your car then fair enough, but if it's at the front then one thing is clear - no matter how it happened, *you hit them*. Your responsibility, end of story. As a self-proclaimed careful driver, you should know this.

PS: no such thing as road tax

PPS: accidents caused whilst on a bike are covered under your home insurance if liability is proved

PPPS: I do firmly believe that peds should be well within their rights to clothesline any cyclist on the pavement or jumping a red light at a pedestrian crossing.
#5 at 12:58:53 - 05/12/2007
Espad
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/is cyclist
/obeys road laws
/agrees whole-heartedly with mike
#6 at 12:59:28 - 05/12/2007
peej
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What Dan said, and I'm not going to reproduce my answer to this thread (or EG's counterpart to it) because it's not really about cyclists, it's about cunts. And there are far too many cunts on the road - not just on bikes but in cars, in trucks, on buses, on motorbikes too.

Like I said there - an instance like this last night caused a huge row with the missus because she believes that even when a cyclist acts like a cunt, the law will always come off in favour of them over a motorist who hits 'em even if they do so because they couldn't realistically do anything else.

That really is a shite state of affairs.

Peej
#7 at 13:47:25 - 05/12/2007
djchump
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/adds drivers of 4x4 and sports cars who have extremely bright headlights and keep pace behind or alongside me on the motorway, blinding me via my mirrors.

Goddamnit I need to see!
#8 at 14:26:29 - 05/12/2007
Retroid
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I could add some bile towards car drivers as a pedestrian, but I'll save it for now.
#9 at 14:31:43 - 05/12/2007
Legion
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Rhythm said:This thread needs renaming - it isn't a cyclist rant, it's a "shithead road users" rant. Yes, jumping red lights is cuntish and dangerous, but guess what? Not every cyclist does it. Stop labelling.

The prospect of getting someone to pay for the damage to your car is a bit silly too - there's no requirement for peds to have lights on so if you hit one as they stepped into the road from, say, behind a truck would you want them to pay up?

If the damage is to the side or rear of your car then fair enough, but if it's at the front then one thing is clear - no matter how it happened, *you hit them*. Your responsibility, end of story. As a self-proclaimed careful driver, you should know this.

PS: no such thing as road tax

PPS: accidents caused whilst on a bike are covered under your home insurance if liability is proved

PPPS: I do firmly believe that peds should be well within their rights to clothesline any cyclist on the pavement or jumping a red light at a pedestrian crossing.

Yeah Ok Mr "Motorists are evil", I'll stop labelling. Plus I the thread title does say "cunting cyclists" not all cyclists and I do go on to rant on about one person in particular.


How is it silly getting payment? If another car smashes into yours then you're entitled to compensation, what *is* silly is suggesting that it's different if someone is using a different mode of transport. If someone smashed a trolly into my car in a supermarket car-park I'd fully expect them to cover the repairs.

In your example, if someone did step into my car, head on, from behind a parked vehicle, I would *insist* that they pay up, and in the case that they died on the impact (caused to them being unable to think before walking out into a busy road) I would seek compensation from their family and estate. Why should I be blamed or even out of pocket because someone is incable of crossing a road safely?

End of story my pert-buttocks. 'Story' I'll allow as it's a complete work of fiction. If you're travelling along at 70mph on the motorway and someone jumps out in front of your car, it's *impossible* to react that quickly, how on earth is is the "evil drivers" fault. It's that sort of attidude with really pisses me off. The whole "speed kills" argument as well, no I think you'll find that it's not the speed that caused the accident it was the fact that you didn't look where you're walking.

You can stick in all the "PPPPPS"es you want. It doesn't change the fact that a lot of cyclists become exceptional cunts in winter. Any driver that kills a cyclist who doesn't use lights should be allowed to reclaim any expenses from their estate, or at the very least by selling what remaining functional organs they have on the black market.

#10 at 16:36:31 - 05/12/2007
Legion
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Unfortuantely I agree with your missus. The law is screwed against the motorist. It'd be a similar situation if when driving home tonight you drove through your local housing estate, at 20mph, even though it's a 30mph zone, because you know kids play there, and little Timmy jumps out in front of your car because he's chasing a ball. It's impossible for you to stop and you instantly kill him. It's an unfortunate event, indeed, but what do you think happens next?

a) The residents call an ambulance for the child and check to see if the driver is in shock?

b) Open up the drivers door, drag him out and then beat him to death with their bare hands

#11 at 16:41:50 - 05/12/2007
Rhythm
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Legion said:
Rhythm said:This thread needs renaming - it isn't a cyclist rant, it's a "shithead road users" rant. Yes, jumping red lights is cuntish and dangerous, but guess what? Not every cyclist does it. Stop labelling.

The prospect of getting someone to pay for the damage to your car is a bit silly too - there's no requirement for peds to have lights on so if you hit one as they stepped into the road from, say, behind a truck would you want them to pay up?

If the damage is to the side or rear of your car then fair enough, but if it's at the front then one thing is clear - no matter how it happened, *you hit them*. Your responsibility, end of story. As a self-proclaimed careful driver, you should know this.

PS: no such thing as road tax

PPS: accidents caused whilst on a bike are covered under your home insurance if liability is proved

PPPS: I do firmly believe that peds should be well within their rights to clothesline any cyclist on the pavement or jumping a red light at a pedestrian crossing.

Yeah Ok Mr "Motorists are evil", I'll stop labelling. Plus I the thread title does say "cunting cyclists" not all cyclists and I do go on to rant on about one person in particular.


How is it silly getting payment? If another car smashes into yours then you're entitled to compensation, what *is* silly is suggesting that it's different if someone is using a different mode of transport. If someone smashed a trolly into my car in a supermarket car-park I'd fully expect them to cover the repairs.

In your example, if someone did step into my car, head on, from behind a parked vehicle, I would *insist* that they pay up, and in the case that they died on the impact (caused to them being unable to think before walking out into a busy road) I would seek compensation from their family and estate. Why should I be blamed or even out of pocket because someone is incable of crossing a road safely?

End of story my pert-buttocks. 'Story' I'll allow as it's a complete work of fiction. If you're travelling along at 70mph on the motorway and someone jumps out in front of your car, it's *impossible* to react that quickly, how on earth is is the "evil drivers" fault. It's that sort of attidude with really pisses me off. The whole "speed kills" argument as well, no I think you'll find that it's not the speed that caused the accident it was the fact that you didn't look where you're walking.

You can stick in all the "PPPPPS"es you want. It doesn't change the fact that a lot of cyclists become exceptional cunts in winter. Any driver that kills a cyclist who doesn't use lights should be allowed to reclaim any expenses from their estate, or at the very least by selling what remaining functional organs they have on the black market.



O_O

/loses hope in humanity

/leaves AATG to avoid further conflict
#12 at 16:43:18 - 05/12/2007
Lutzie
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Rhythm said: but if it's at the front then one thing is clear - no matter how it happened, *you hit them*. Your responsibility, end of story.

Nope, wrong. Erm. End of story.

If you're driving along and a cyclist comes flying out of a junction and hits the front of your car it's the cyclists fault.

World in: "not black and white!" shocker.

It's not just cyclists or driver to blame. Simply put you will encounter cunts in all walks of everyday life.
#13 at 17:35:04 - 05/12/2007
peej
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Lutzie said:


It's not just cyclists or driver to blame. Simply put you will encounter cunts in all walks of everyday life.


This is the true end of the thread...

Peej
#14 at 17:46:15 - 05/12/2007
Whizzo
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Not really relevant but this popped into my head with all this cunt talk.

"We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit! "
#15 at 17:50:47 - 05/12/2007
Stevas
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Just the five minute argument for me, I'm off home in a bit.

FUCK YOU UBISOFT
#16 at 18:09:30 - 05/12/2007
Salaman
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The Uk, GB whatever the fuck you lot want to call it is a great, modern, western, prosperous country in many ways and is a very, very poor & underdeveloped country in some other ways.

When it comes to public health care, you're about on par with Zimbabwe in my eyes and when it comes to road infrastructure you're about on par with Albania or something.

As long as you have a road infrastructure which often is inadequate for normal traffic use (passenger cars, lorries, motorbikes etc) but which needs to also accommodate cyclists on top of that, you'll see no end to the motorists ranting about "cunting cyclists" and the cyclists raging about "cunting motorists" and the individual incidents that induce these rants.
You can have a good rant at the individual idiot that put you in harms way but at the end of the day it's your government that's to blame IMHO.

There's different ways.
Compare these roads:

UK: one lane each way, no cycling facilities
Netherlands: One lane each way with a completely separate cycling path

Belgium: one lane each way with cycling lane on the side

You've got idiot drivers on bicycles on motorbikes on cars in delivery vans and in lorries cruising the countries' roads. Having them all share the same space on the roads is just so 1970s. Most countries 've moved on from that ages ago.
#17 at 18:57:56 - 05/12/2007
angeltreats
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It was like that when we went to Italy this summer. A great big cycle lane at the side of the road, it was great.

Oh and btw, I dunno whose bright idea it was to make skinny little bike lanes and then allow cars to park in them, thus rendering them useless. But I'd like to smack them.
#18 at 19:28:13 - 05/12/2007
nekotcha
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I'm quite tempted to post an 'Open post to cunting drivers' actually, given that I nearly got knocked off my bike not once but twice this morning, once by someone who decided to accelerate - hard - out of a t-junction I was passing when I was right in front of himm and the second time by a guy behind me who just decided I was going too slowly for him and so tried to muscle his way past despite the fact that there wasn't room for my bike and his car side by side on that part of the road - cue me wobbling into the curb. Tossers the pair of them.

Generally agreed about the whole 'general crap road users' though. To be fair I've seen plenty of crap cyclists on the roads too.
#19 at 22:19:55 - 05/12/2007
Legion
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Yeah but 'cunting drivers' has been done to death! ;)
#20 at 22:32:00 - 05/12/2007
kentmonkey
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I have more of a problem with motorcyclists.

They all seem to think that passing inbetween cars on a motorway is both legal and safe, that throttling their engine just as they pass your car in the summer with the window down is hilarious, that the speed limit doesn't apply to them as they have two wheels and that pulling up in front of you at the lights is fair...but not just at the lights, further forward than the lights so they can't see when they go green and you try to pull away with them still sat their anonymous to the fact that they can go.

To quote Pete from Big Brother...cough-weep-wankers!
#21 at 22:54:03 - 05/12/2007
Whizzo
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Lane splitting is legal in the UK, obviously doing it when it's dangerous isn't.
#22 at 01:11:19 - 06/12/2007
strangeed
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Motorcyclists = Organ donors

It's like the saying: There is many a bold pilot and many an old pilot but you will never find an old and bold pilot. There's always the problem that idiots using any form of transport in a dangerous way are likely to harm others, not just themselves.

Oh and the bike lanes are only actually widespread in Flanders, not Wallonia. I do agree they're nice though.

#23 at 10:10:21 - 06/12/2007
Salaman
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One more reason to split up the bloody country then. ;-)
Can't be sharing one nation with such a bunch of primitives.
#24 at 10:51:35 - 06/12/2007
oneiros
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kentmonkey said:
I have more of a problem with motorcyclists. They all seem to think that (yada, yada, yada)

I thought we'd already established it wasn't *all* cyclists that were cunts, or *all* car drivers for that matter. Yet now apparently, all bikers are! :(

It's been said before, but if everybody was required to pass their bike test before they were allowed to drive a car, the general level of awareness and responsibility on the roads might increase dramatically. Hell, even taking the Cycling Proficiency Test might help...
#25 at 11:05:08 - 06/12/2007
peej
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I'd settle for an IQ test. And personality profiling.

Peej
#26 at 11:37:35 - 06/12/2007
Salaman
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peej said:I'd settle for an IQ test. And personality profiling.

Peej


I thought you hated taking the bus?
#27 at 12:20:35 - 06/12/2007
peej
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Salaman said:
peej said:I'd settle for an IQ test. And personality profiling.

Peej


I thought you hated taking the bus?


That had better be in reference to the latter and not the former!

Peej
#28 at 12:21:43 - 06/12/2007

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