Wasps are the c*nts of the insect kingdom


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peej
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Right, I've fucking HAD IT with wasps. All summer long they've been buzzing around like chavs at a bus-stop annoying the piss out of everyone and giving nothing back. Now, they're all dozy and pissed up on nectar and are flying around stinging the fuck out of anything or anyone who dares to share their airspace. I've been stung twice already this week (once behind the ear which hurt like fuck, and once on the knee which again hurt like bloody hell!)

Why are they proliferating but bees are dying out? And aside from my trusty electric tennis racket is there anything I can do to systematically eradicate the wasp race?
#1 at 15:28:35 - 11/08/2009
Binky
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I propose we all move underground for the summer. Wasps are the most unnecessary and crap thing to roam the planet.

In fact, is Joe Pasquale a wasp?
#2 at 16:45:42 - 11/08/2009
peej
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He has the same annoying buzzy whine about 'im. But lacks the black and yellow stripes.

And that's another thing, it's almost like mother natures KNEW wasps were going to be crap, so clad them in the most unfashionable colours she could. I mean the only thing that looks good in black and yellow is a JCB
#3 at 16:46:58 - 11/08/2009
Syrok
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I like wasps, bees on the other hand I don't trust at all.
#4 at 17:44:17 - 11/08/2009
Binky
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Sir, you are sick.

Apparently in the whole world only 1, 220 people agree with you (via google).

Results 1 - 10 of about 1,220 for "I like wasps". (0.18 seconds)

Where as, 4 times as many people prefer cancer.

Results 1 - 10 of about 4,230 for "I like cancer". (0.31 seconds)
#5 at 19:46:45 - 11/08/2009
mal
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Bees are cool, unless they're africanised, in which case they're antisocial arseholes. On the other hand, with a wasp you know it's going to be a cunt, so you know what you're dealing with.
#6 at 19:30:19 - 12/08/2009
Syrok
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But wasps are more beautiful. :)
#7 at 19:55:57 - 12/08/2009
Carlo
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I've just had to call them guys out to sort out a wasp nest in my bay-window.

Bastard sneaky fucks were getting into my house.

I do not like them much either.
#8 at 01:39:19 - 13/08/2009
peej
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I had to dig a (luckily dead) wasps nest out of my loft a few years back. They'd built it over one of the lighting wires, so as I pulled the thing to disengage it from the rafter they'd attached it to, the wire cut through it like cheesewire the more I pulled, which meant I ended up with two halves of the thing falling onto me and a fuckload of dead wasps. You've never heard screams like it!
#9 at 10:56:52 - 13/08/2009
JimJam
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peej said:I had to dig a (luckily dead) wasps nest out of my loft a few years back. They'd built it over one of the lighting wires, so as I pulled the thing to disengage it from the rafter they'd attached it to, the wire cut through it like cheesewire the more I pulled, which meant I ended up with two halves of the thing falling onto me and a fuckload of dead wasps. You've never heard screams like it!


:D

Similar situation at ours a couple of years ago. Our bathroom had those flush halogen spots installed in the ceiling, and directly above is a bit of attic that is unreachable, but I suspected there was a wasps nest in there a couple of years ago. Changed the bulb on one of the spots and a load of dead wasps fell out of the hole onto my head. We had a nest in the wall cavity last year too - bunch of wankers.
#10 at 01:11:58 - 17/08/2009
Salaman
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In the studio I rented in the UK I was hearing this odd faint scrabbling noise.
As if someone was in the wall scratching it from the inside. I kept meaning to tell the landlord but didn't get around to it for ages.
It was a bit spooky to be sat at the PC in the evening and to hear this faint *scratch* *scratch* *scratch* noise at the edge of hearing.

I eventually told the landlord.
We had a look outside and noticed wasps going in between the roof tiles at 3 different points, each about 4-5 feet apart.

It conjured up images of a massive 15ft wasp nest in the walls along the whole length of the place, filled with 1000s and 1000s of nasty angry wasps, separated from me by a faint thing bit of walls which they were steadily chewing their way through until one night they'd bust through and swarm the inside of the studio stinging me to death.

Lucky the exterminator chappy came around and sorted them out before that happened and I moved away back to Belgium soon after.

#11 at 17:06:17 - 17/08/2009
mal
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Blimey! I sometimes hear scratchy noises in the wall that separates this half of the house from the other, but I'm pretty sure it's just soot falling down the chimney.

One good thing about wasps though: watching people dance and dance about any time a hoverfly comes around. Look guys, the clue's in the name - if it's hovering, it's a hoverfly. If it's buzzing around you with an evil grin on its face it's a wasp. But heh, it is funny.
#12 at 02:55:09 - 18/08/2009
peej
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Yup my missus hates hoverflies and can't tell the difference between wasps and hoverflies most of the time, but I'm slowly introducing her to the concept that if a wasp goes near my nipper, it will die a horrible death. If a hoverfly does, it gets left alone.
#13 at 09:27:03 - 18/08/2009
JimJam
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The problem with killing them, a hobby of mine until fairly recently, is that they apparently release a pheremone at time of death that attracts other wasps. If you kill one, watch another 3 or 4 turn up fairly quickly...
#14 at 14:56:12 - 18/08/2009
peej
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Yup it's true. I think they also release that pheromone if you do my favourite trick of trapping them under a beer glass. Trap one, and all his mates will turn up to gloat / attempt a rescue / end up with the same fate.

Record wasps trapped under a glass: 11 before it got so dangerous for the poor bastard collecting glasses to release them that we just up-ended the glass in a smooth movement, put a beermat on the end, then slowly drowned the buggers in stale beer instead.
#15 at 16:31:58 - 18/08/2009

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